Welcome to Sounds of Soul!
Singing sounds from my soul has been one of the most empowering tools in my life
I believe using our voice is a human right, with immense healing power
Not something reserved for songs, performers or “perfection”
However, this wasn’t something I always knew
For 7 years, I believed I was one of the people on the planet who couldn’t sing
And I let this belief stop me from doing something I once loved
I’ve shared my story and some sounds of soul below for inspiration
If you are curious about sound healing, using your voice as a tool for emotional healing, or about discovering your voice, I also offer sessions in person or over Skype that are outlined below
May our voices rise and may we sing and share the sounds of our soul
I, like most little girls, loved singing. One of my favorite stories my dad tells of my childhood is the time he took me to a golf camp. Instead of learning the game with the rest of the children, he kept finding me off to the side of the green singing to the flowers. I started acting at age 6 and it was my passion throughout school.
In middle school, we moved to Southern California, and I auditioned for my first musical, The Music Man. I was so excited! I had learned and prepared the song, Raindrops on Roses, from my favorite musical, The Sound of Music. After the audition, in front of a panel of judges, one of the woman told me that my acting abilities were above par, but my voice was off key and not good enough to get me a bigger role than chorus. That one statement, from that one woman changed my perception of self.
From that moment forward, I stopped singing. I told everyone I couldn’t sing. I’d get cast lead roles in plays, but wouldn’t even audition for musicals, because of this absolute terror of believing I couldn’t sing. Finally, senior year, my friends convinced me to audition for the yearly musical, High School Musical, ironically. The woman who was judging the audition said that I sang well and hit all the notes perfectly, however, I thought she was just saying that to be kind. I was cast in the biggest role with minimal singing. I had one line. And I practically whispered it into the mic, praying that no one would hear me.
After high school, I traveled alone to New Zealand and WWOOFed and backpacked for 5 months. At my first farm, I remember being on top of a hill in the woods, looking out over the ocean and feeling the spirit of the land move up through the ground into my feet, up my body, and through my mouth. It sounded like an ancient language of half singing and half speaking. It felt so sweet, beautiful, and natural moving through my body, like I was fulfilling a purpose I was made for, but hadn’t discovered yet. This sparked a remembrance of sound. On the trip, I realized that the whole world is made up of vibrations, so theoretically, sound healing should be able to heal any ailment.
Upon returning to the states, I enrolled in a 3 mouth sound healing course through the Globe Institute in San Fransisco. It was such a healing gift. Suzanne Sterlings class on singing from the body shifted everything. I started doing sound healing meditations all the time, becoming fascinated with harmonics. I still didn’t claim to sing. I said I was just toning. It was safer that way. One day, my mom’s friend was in the living room, while I was doing my toning meditation. When I came out, he asked me what meditation CD I was listening to, because the singing was so beautiful. Pretty soon, it was my favorite thing to do. I started channeling my soul language in a mixture of singing and speaking. Then it started happening organically. Once I knew it was inside me, it was like a channel I could tune into with a certain energetic feeling state. Tom Kenyan’s meditations became a staple in my life. His book the Magdalen Manuscripts is to this day in my top 3 favorite books of all time.
Back in 2013, my water teacher, Jumana Sophia, asked if I would priestess a honoring ceremony for the men at the Goddess Temple on Magdalen’s Feast Day. My role was nurturing in the temple. During the ceremony, I felt the energy of the Magdalen fill the room and my body until it was saturated, like a cup about to overflow. I started channeling a sound I’d never expressed before. It had a cathedral quality. I was then lead around the room to each of the men, guided to sing and lay hands. I felt completely in my truest service in that moment. After the ceremony, one of the men said I should make a CD of my singing because he wanted to buy it. From there, my remembrance of one of my innate passions accelerated. I started singing in my room all the time and recording the sounds on my phone.
Before I traveled to Kauai for my 23rd birthday, I purchased a really nice recorder to document my songs. As soon as I got back from the trip, I accidentally put the recorder through the washing machine, death by water. I took it as a sign. More edited songs will come, but for now, here is the pure expression of authenticity. Sharing these sounds aren’t necessarily for pleasure value or to be put on repeat as a song. They are a gift of a different kind. A gift that says here is the authentic sound that came through in this moment and it was profound to me for this reason. It’s to spark a curiosity about what amazing sounds you can discover inside you! I must also confess that it’s an edge for me. That there is something incredibly vulnerable around publicly sharing sounds that come through me. However, this process of sharing my story and sharing the sounds are part of a deeper healing. So I thank YOU for this gift in return.
Singing is one of the most HEALING and EMPOWERING things we can do for our bodies and souls. Yet, we tend to give the music making abilities to “stars” to performers. Singing is a human right, like eating or drinking, not a privilege of people with perfect pitch or catchy choruses. So I invite you to be a vocal activist and give yourself permission to discover the sounds of your soul.